Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
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He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize