Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize