D3 body, D1 cock
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Randomize
