Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Need sex. Gaining weight.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
21 NSFW Facts About Famous Celebrities That Will Blow Your Mind
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
These Are 19 of the Most Horrible Strangers People Had to Sit Next to
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Randomize
