the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
