Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
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