she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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