addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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