im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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