apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
