Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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