I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize