he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Randomize
