I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
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