i barfeds in our rink
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I'm bleeding and have questions
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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