i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
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