Texts From Last Night

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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  yo i have your phone

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  ... oh so you probably won't get this message

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  (202): yo i have your phone (202):... oh so you probably won't get this message http://tfl.nu/0ifv
  Replies (14) Good night (2398) Bad night (1199)
• Favorite

  (972): View more from Texas

  like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys

  (214): View more from Texas

  I hope to god you are high

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  (972): like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys (214): I hope to god you are high http://tfl.nu/z79a
  Replies (12) Good night (3297) Bad night (771)
• Favorite

  (662): View more from Mississippi

  When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.

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  (662): When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis. http://tfl.nu/y0g4
  Replies (10) Good night (2324) Bad night (832)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college

  (516): View more from New York

  is she hot?

  (802): View more from Vermont

  She is now

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  (802): My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college (516): is she hot? (802): She is now http://tfl.nu/4xoq
  Replies (34) Good night (9243) Bad night (931)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  Everybody was literally kung fu fighting

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  (803): Everybody was literally kung fu fighting http://tfl.nu/75ca
  Replies (33) Good night (10797) Bad night (1078)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it

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  (732): and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it http://tfl.nu/ub7i
  Replies (15) Good night (4422) Bad night (1312)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook

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  (+44): If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook http://tfl.nu/6gha
  Replies (8) Good night (5805) Bad night (1147)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now

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  (615): took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now http://tfl.nu/5whe
  Replies (7) Good night (1196) Bad night (2575)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.

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  (+61): I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god. http://tfl.nu/eynz
  Replies (19) Good night (1174) Bad night (6852)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped

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  (781): she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped http://tfl.nu/pl2z
  Replies (8) Good night (1886) Bad night (1078)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.

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  (214): How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk. http://tfl.nu/tw8m
  Replies (4) Good night (508) Bad night (985)
• Favorite

  (646): View more from New York

  I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.

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  (646): I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands. http://tfl.nu/f9cd
  Replies (2) Good night (810) Bad night (1036)
• Favorite

  (219): View more from Indiana

  Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?

  (219): View more from Indiana

  Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.

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  (219): Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts? (219): Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy. http://tfl.nu/z832
  Replies (10) Good night (584) Bad night (1364)
• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.

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  (216): We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret. http://tfl.nu/ko6r
  Replies (2) Good night (760) Bad night (382)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers

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  (206): Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers http://tfl.nu/6qq2
  Replies (2) Good night (659) Bad night (396)

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