I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
