Girls should come with a carfax report
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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