One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
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