If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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