I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
false alarm. still invincible.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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