My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Dick very happy bro
Randomize
