I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
