i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
