Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I think I won the penis lottery.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
