I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
