I'm pants shitting drunk right now
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
This toilet bowl is my home.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize