He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
I'm at about main and main street
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
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