I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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