Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
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