So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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