btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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