i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
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She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
He? As in you personified your dick?
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
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