I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
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