His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
