Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
