did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
