New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
There's even glitter on my cock...
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
