Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
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