You made me cry and you don't even care
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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