so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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