The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
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