I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
