Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
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