this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
operation harelip BJ is a go
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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