last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize