It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
You need Xanax blowdarts
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
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