only if we run a train.
done.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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