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  • Submitted by RAAAAAAAANDY on Sep 2, 10 at 2:39pm

    Yet you have the motor skills too send a perfect text.

    • 41 43
      Submitted by Le_Todd on Sep 2, 10 at 4:58pm

      It's been proven, it takes less skill to masturbate than text. http://whatIdesiredtosay.wordpress.com

    • 33 46
      Submitted by skootles on Sep 2, 10 at 5:43pm

      How do you know they didn't spend 10 minutes writing that text?

      • 40 48
        Submitted by RAAAAAAAANDY on Sep 2, 10 at 7:34pm

        No, masturbating takes only two things: an upward and a downward hand motion. Texting takes focus, thinking, typing, and multitasking.

    • 27 44
      Submitted by freckleface on Sep 2, 10 at 9:33pm

      I was thinking the exact same thing.

  • 64 38
    Submitted by austinonymouss on Sep 3, 10 at 1:19am

    Totally cant be real.

  • 61 42
    Submitted by enoxxx on Sep 2, 10 at 4:47pm

    if you were that drunk you wouldn't be able to text. I call bullshit.

  • 51 36
    Submitted by nattielite on Sep 2, 10 at 3:27pm

    @WTF_ever... You win a one way trip to a desert with no cell phone towers, with Firsty.

  • 48 39
    Submitted by dudewalker on Sep 2, 10 at 5:43pm

    I call Pelosi (bullshit) too.

  • 48 41
    Submitted by Valkyrie on Sep 2, 10 at 3:03pm

    But your texting skills are still pretty sharp! Go you!

  • 52 49
    Submitted by jasboo on Sep 2, 10 at 2:38pm

    get the peanut butter and let the dog in....

  • 41 37
    Submitted by dontsayTHATHIGH on Sep 2, 10 at 7:03pm

    Dangit. They should have said "I can't even masturbate. THAT DRUNK.

  • 42 41
    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 2, 10 at 6:08pm

    Yet u can text? Sure.

  • 39 40
    Submitted by urallstupid on Sep 2, 10 at 5:10pm

    FAKE!!!

  • 44 59
    Submitted by o_0 on Sep 2, 10 at 10:27pm

    "I'm getting really sick of guys named Todd."\n ~Carlin

  • 26 33
    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 3, 10 at 9:53am

    Ha I hate firsty toi

  • 38 70
    Submitted by WTF_ever on Sep 2, 10 at 2:36pm

    What do you win if your First?

  • 27 50
    Submitted by blackhalfrican on Sep 3, 10 at 1:43am

    Auto-correct doesn't write the whole fucking text, you twat.

  • 31 68
    Submitted by trke0302 on Sep 2, 10 at 2:52pm

    Ever heard of autocorrect? Chump

  • 6 19
    Submitted by theFungusAmongUs on Aug 25, 12 at 2:48pm

    Not to mention the iq and motor skills required to spell masturbation