I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
